Current Affairs

Sunday - brother Gareth's birthday. Went with the family to the Hilton in Cardiff as a surprise to use the gym, the pool, the sauna (it was like a sauna in there!) and good old birthday meal. Really plush in there, very me, excellent facilities and I particularly liked the coloured lighting and music played in the swimming pool/spa area. I could get used to that kind of life, it was similar to when Dan, Nate and I had our own private spa and sauna in Cronulla. I could have gotten used to that as well. One day, maybe.

So, speaking of the Hilton, it was my first time inside one, boom boom. Now, despite the legacy, it is Paris Hilton, as everyone knows, who is the most talked about member of that family. I know Doctah J thinks she's smoking hot and is a big fan, but I'm yet to be convinced. She was recently introduced at the Brit Awards Ceremony as "You've heard of the X Factor, but here is the Why Factor." When I was in Australia, I read in the paper how Paris Hilton was to do a tour of said country (not sure what she was doing) and her PA had phoned up several restaurants asking if they would like to pay $100,000 for Paris Hilton to dine at their restaurant!

It does amaze me how wrapped up in celebrity today's society can be for someone, who as far as I know is only famous for being stupid and making home videos, would seem to have the arrogance to make such demands. However, then you have to realise, she can make those demands because she is used to that sort of life, being paid thousands to eat out, go to a bar, whatever. Tis a strange world we live in.

In other news, Britain is apparently opening up its national archives to disclose gay/lesbian historical information that was never made public because of its nature. Fair enough I say. Here is an example of one poster never released and it makes me think that other European countries may have had similar propaganda in their past. It would explain why Igor fled his home country.

Olympic Dreams

Now I could never pretend to harbour dreams to become a professional snowboarder, having only participated on a handful of occasions. In fact, I'm not even in Dub and MJ's league and that's pretty bad. However, having seen the new craze of Snowboard Cross, I wanna go! That sport looks really cool and it makes me want to escape the wind and rain here in Wales and head to the slopes. The fact you can jump and race at the same time looks to have quite an adrenalin rush. I need to do some more snowboarding when I get back to Canada.

Dub & MJ 1 - Matty 1?

I had the good fortune and fantastic pleasure of attending the Wales v Scotland 6 Nations Rugby this afternoon. One of the best things about Cardiff's fancy Millenium Stadium is that it is right in the middle of the city and I will never ever get tired of walking round Cardiff on a match day, with all the pump and excitement rugby brings to my country. And today, despite the cold and the wind, it also brought thousands of Scottish men wearing their national dress - skirts.

Brilliant game, wonderful atmosphere. I had goose bumps right from the beginning, when they brought out the choir and the opera singers to sing the anthem. I have been lucky enough to see Wales many times (never before as grand slam champions tho!) but still find it an overwhelming experience each time. And they played really well, great performance by every player, winning 28-18.

However, the most important part of this afternoon was that I contributed to our international mission to spread the word about Cole Hobson. Following the lead of dear MJ, I have tried to warn people of said Cole. Here are my attempts:




You have been warned!

PS. Dan, I missed the 3rd try as I was reading a text off you! Thanks Bud!

Dim Balls O Gwbl

Translates to 'No balls at all.' In the news this week, it appears that Jordan, seen here below is to have her breasts reduced after several operations to increase them over the years.



Apparently when she has her silicon implants removed, they will be auctioned on ebay. Ok, but the interesting thing is one bookies has offered odds of 5-1 that they will go for over £10,000. But why have I called referred to someone not having any balls in this post?

Well it refers to me not having the guts to invest in such a bet. Occasionally I have a gut instinct to go for some bets at the bookies but always pull out as I don't like gambling on things out of my hands. But perhaps this isn't such a situation.

If I went down the bookies and placed £10,000 on Jordan's implants, I would win £50,000 plus my original stake if they went for over 10k right? Right. So, what is stopping me doing this and then bidding ten grand on ebay for said implants to ensure they go for that amount and guarantee I win my little bet. Of course, I could also go down the bank, explain the situation to the manager and borrow a million to bet with.

This one has been bugging me for a couple of days. See it just seems like such an easy way to win some big cash but this is the real world so I'm not gonna risk that kind of money on something where there's bound to be a catch. It's kinda frustrating cos you see this kind of thing happening all the time in Hollywood. And then me and Dan could afford that Hooters franchise sooner rather than later!

Apology

I would like to sincerely offer my apologies to one of my closest friends, Whisky Dan O'Rourke, seen here getting his lovely girlfriend, Laura, to do the chores.


Yesterday was Daniel's 26th birthday, that's right 26! Wow, he's old and it seems the gap has widened! However, rather than attend what I'm sure was a great evening that coincided with Superbowl, (the one Seattle threw away by not scoring enough when they had the ball first half), I decided to give it a miss and actually spent my Sunday gardening and watching soccer.

Now, I have two reasons for not seeing my buddy on his special day. One being I couldn't be bothered to fly over but second, and most importantly, I wouldn't want to show Dan up on his birthday again. This time last year, we threw Dan a surprise party with a surprise century challenge before we headed off to the bar. This resulted in Greg Smith and myself completing said challenge despite using large shot glasses, and Dan, humiliated and defeated after his useless attempt to complete the task.

So I must ask for forgiveness for this shameful episode last year where Greg and I left Dan looking like a pathetic failure, which we all know he is not (pfft). Therefore, I would like to offer this coupon (coupon will not be validated) as a peace offering, upon which I will buy you a beer on your 27th (and not before). I hope the tragic events of 2005 will be erased by my absence in 2006.

Cheers Dan!

Outrage

Really nice day today in the main.

Woke up, it's my Dad's birthday, so spent the morning with cards and presents and the like. He was happy, got things he could use although my gift is still stuck in the post.

Went off to soccer, in a jovial mood. Since I got back from Oz, we have lost 4 straight games which is absolutely unprecedented for this team and a complete joke as we should have won at least three of them. Whatever, things can only get better we thought, we figured we were playing a cup game against good opposition but with a new kit so were kinda optimistic. Stuffed 'em 4-1. Wicked, everyone played really well.

Ran off the pitch, out of the shower quicker than Igor when there's an audience, and straight past the pub, home to watch the rugby. Wales lost to England. Typical, but there's hope, England have a very good side and Wales were missing many key players. Shit happens but we'll come back again.

Picked up Chinese takeaway for a surprise for Dad. Awesome meal, had never heard of this restaurant but its quality. However, did have time to recall the last time I had crispy beef. That was in Revesby, when I took the lovely Mrs Jane Bigelow out for a meal. Does Doctah know about that? Mum then decided to pay for the pay-per-view soccer game, Man Utd won, day back to good again.

Offered to take Dad out for a game of snooker. I've been playing pretty well since I got back from Down Under and am in training. I have a score to settle on the snooker table with Richard so that is the single most important reason I go back there, even ahead of seeing the Doctahs.

Strangely, Dad says no. He says he'd rather an evening in where me and my brother teach Mum and Dad how to play poker. I thought that was cool, apparently he and Mum wanted to find out what the fuss was about this game we play and watch on tele. So we played, they picked it up so well despite knowing bugger all about poker beforehand and are now far more accomplished players than people like The Trott, Niall, Cat and Twathead (my new name for Lois, I think it suits her). It really was good, Mum kept folding cos she knew 9-5 off-suit isn't good and Dad started betting pre-flop on Pocket Aces, I seriously was proud. And then Dad got Pocket Rockets again, twice in a night! Well, I guess it is his birthday.

Eventually Mum and Dad are knocked out and Me and Ga decide there's no point carrying on when we're only playing for fun and I had a good lead. But then, then comes the absolute mockery of fair play, standards, etiquette which I must confess was an absolute master stroke.

After only 2 or 3 hands, Dad had worked out the game. On his next deal he then decided to remove the aces from the pack and stow them under the table until he had hands he didn't fancy. And it worked a trick, no-one noticed, he cleaned up a couple of times and no-one had a clue. Awesome, we wouldn't have known till he decided he was so proud he should tell us. And even considering all the sport I saw today, I thought that was the best move of the lot. Apparently there's still life left in the old dog yet! Happy Birthday Dad!